..Life Feeds on Life..

i dont evenknow what to say about today..

2007-09-12T03:13:36Z

just yea. yea. :)

doin ok, i think.

2007-09-09T04:23:56Z

so ive been going on my marry way, doing my thing, even though i still dont feel i have closure on to why my last relationship ended. Its kind of catching up with me i think. I have been haveing insomnia and it really sucks. I shouldnt be so bummed it wasnt a very long relationship i guess i am just in shock still...tonight i stood were we had our first kiss and i cant really get a grip on my emotions right now, i guess all i can do it shove them somewhere untill they dissapear....life goes on. Sarah comes home tomarrow and i am so excited!! :D Does any one read this?? Iam so random, does that mean i am crazy?? Idk. Bye.

things looking up.

2007-09-05T17:27:57Z

i still dont know what to say about my entire summer, but whatever, you get something out of everything, right? any ways..ive been off my horrible birth controlfro a few weeks now that made me just seriously go down a downward spiral. i dont even wanna talk about it. i but lately i just feel awsome and i am seriously like wicked happy to be back in school it just puts me in an awsome mood being around alot of people who are passionate about the same things i am. AND me and meg and gab hopefully get this place thats wicked cute on tipp hill..if not somewhere else, eather way were getting a place and i am wicked pumped :D and i am just happy in general, its awsome. being on that birthcontrol made me see what depression felt like and its awful there snothing you can do about it and i feel horrible for anyone who has depressiona nd just cant get out of it..for me it was just as simple as not taking my pill any more, some people are lost in it and have no idea what to do, awful.

Relationships...

2007-09-02T03:49:06Z

what are relationships?? i am not talking about like friend, busness and relitive relationships, i am talking singnificant other relationships. they start out amazing and you just feel like you couldnt get anny happier and the fact is you probably cant. things can only get worse when you feel that way..and they do. sometimes this is just a several year prosses...for the few and fourtunate, this isnt a prosses. why? beucase they dont smother each other, they start off the bat with room to breathe. and they dont depend on each other to make eachother happy. beucase the fact is you cant depend on ANYONE to make you happy you have to be happy with yourself and know how to make yourself happy befor some one else can truly make you happy. this what i need to learn to do..ive always been so blind and feel like nothing else matters. when the fact usually is there are alot of other things in my life that actaully matter more....i cant wait untill the day i meet the guy i dont feel obligated to call everytime i am thinking of doing anything...thats so high school and i am over that. AND, also, i cant wait to meet a guy who seeks pleasure in doing sweet little things for me as much as i would for them..in other words..reciprocation. i am sick of making sacrifices and getting nothing in return but pain. bull feces city. the end.

wow

2007-08-30T07:02:58Z

so, megan reminded me that live journal still exists and we sat down haveing the time of our lives reading old posts from high school hahahaha! and i cant belive how many peope still actaully use this!! i think i am gunna start useing it again for old times sake....to update a bit i guess i will just fastforward a year..i am going back to my second year at occ for interious design, excited for that. this summer has been pretty interesting...speant 90% of it with a stranger apparently...so i am pretty misserable right now, but i know it can only get better from here :)

MIAMI FL

2006-01-08T05:24:44Z

I whent HERE

and just did what ever...

brackishwishes @ 2005-11-11T11:08:00

2005-10-11T15:32:04Z

So I dont update much..theres seriously no time. I get up in the morning..go to school then go straight to work...get out at 430 see josh for a few hours do my home work (if theres time) then try to get some sleep and do it all over again. I've been stressing trying to figure out what I am doing after high school..and it seems like OCC is my only option at this point according to my parents...and I've been looking at the curriculum and I dont think any of it is for me..I thought maybe I would take the interior design rute..but what if I get a few months into it and Im like fuck this?? Im thinking maybe it would really be better If I just take some time off after school and really try and finde what I want to get out of life..maybe travel around or something..if i rush into a desision, chances are its not gunna be the right one. And its hard when your options are limited to one school..im like not even allowwed to look at the curriculum of ony other school or something..thats the way it seems atleast b/c any other school i mention its "No your not going there."

Any way..Some other things on my minde...

Lately this night just seems to keep replaying over and over again in my head..and I swear that I see kaitlins face every-where..but then I look again and it was just my mind fucking with me. Idk if the reaitlity if like just sinking in or what.

On a more positive note...
Me and have been together for 8 months this friday..time fucking flys. Its rediculous..in four more months it will already have been a fucking year..The appartmeants nice..moneys always tight but we just make it...it'll be easier when I graduate high school.

Oh and i made a MYSPACE. I just need to take some updated pictures to put in it..and idk were the fuck my camera is..nice.

brackishwishes @ 2005-10-19T16:04:00

2005-09-19T19:57:24Z

So i worked like crazy last weekend, then finally got to party! At chelseas, not with josh of corse cuz he was working :( there was 234234 people and i brought tim and ryan teska, whom i havent seen in oh about, 800 years...then picked up josh at 7am :) and slept for like 2 hours the whole weekend and i think im getting sick now becuase of it. Oh well. Sex drugs and rock and roll.

brackishwishes @ 2005-10-15T16:06:00

2005-09-15T19:59:05Z

Awww my boy friend is the cutest boy friend int he wholllllle world :) I got home yesterday and there was a dozen pink roses for our 7 months....he had to walk down the road with a box of flowers hahaha awwwww :)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!And I got him nothing....b/c i am a bad girlfriend. :(

Any ways...We got a simease kitten and named it Jasmine and gave it a little spiked collar its so cute i want to squeez it till it blows up, it meows alot tho and sometimes me and josh are tempted to throw it against the wall. But we love her :)

brackishwishes @ 2005-10-09T15:27:00

2005-09-09T19:16:57Z

At work with chels right now, its fun.

And I like most of my classes I know people and its fun, school is FUN YAY!

brackishwishes @ 2005-09-27T12:32:00

2005-08-27T16:49:53Z

Yep...so tomarrow is my last fucking god damned day at Borios. No more smelling like rotting fish every night, and no more smelly old people with food hanging out of their mouths, and no more kids blowing chunks every were, and no more old men shitting their pants, no more sweating my ass off in 90 degree heat in a smelly basemeant sorting thousends of peices of silverwear for hours, no more people yelling at me beucase they cant wait their turn for a table, or beicase they cant get the specizal table they want or they might have indigestion, no more snobby old people that walk with their nses in the hair and act like nothings good enopugh for them no matter how much you try and compinsate them, no more rude old drunk men yelling at me beucase their flights are cancelled....

i will miss..pizzas being thrown at my head...my boss trying to throw me in a 4 foot tall tub of grease and lard...old women getting trashed...my boss threatening rude coustomers with physical harm...old people who forgot what car they drove there...i could go on i suppose...I start my new job with chelsea monday, im sooper pumped!!

brackishwishes @ 2005-09-17T16:34:00

2005-08-17T20:46:13Z

SO yea i dont update alot..but yea got a tattoo..got an appartmeant thats like rediculously nice, i think its nicer than my house..moveing in ths weedend with josh!!

went to cedar point with josh of corse and buddy and chelsea, it was awsome untill it downpoored preventing me form going on the two biggest rollercoasters in the country...the Millenium force..wich is twice the size of the superman, and, the Dragster thats like who knows how huge and has a stright 180 degree drop at 120 mph..the main reason i went. I almost cried, but i didnt, instead me and josh held on the metal pole under a table durring the thunder and lightning hell storm that ruind my day. I wish i could of posted pictures of all the rollercoasters i DID get to go on but i just used a disposable camera cuzi alwayse loose the ones in my digital camera..I went on the raptor that like the minde eriser but like bigger and better...the corkscrew that like the viper kind a, really short one, umm the mantus, it was a stand up roller coaster, that was pretty cool, then the Magnum XL200, that was pretty cool, i think it was bigger than the superman and it was like a 5 min rollercoaster i swear..then josh made me go on the power tower which it a huge tower that shoots you up and drops you down, it was fun and i ended up doing it twice. Yea no one prolly cares about my awsome time so ill update in about another 3 weekskbye! Oh yeah and schools coming up soon...FUCK.

brackishwishes @ 2005-08-29T11:42:00

2005-07-29T15:42:36Z

AHHHHH Im getting another tattoo tomarrow, im kinda nervous but ill take it like a man, oh yea and i turn 18 tomarrow. WOOOOOOOOOOO! So this is it...my child hood is over...im going to be an adult. :( Oh and,, i have this desighn all drawn out to add on to my gay nautical star, it would be mour smaller stars rapping around to the front of my lower stomach in like ribbon things it looks cool but i think i should hold off for a while, one tattoo at a time, dont wanna go too crazy.

This is kind of scarey...

2005-07-24T17:52:21Z

Global warming could cause drastic changes
Updated: 7/23/2005 9:57 PM
By: Kristin Smith, News 10 Now Web Staff

Scientists at the National Academy of Sciences this week agreed that the globe is warming at an alarming rate, and it’s caused primarily by humans.

Earth has warmed about seven-tenths of a degree since 1970.

While that may not feel like much to us, it could mean very big changes in our oceans and our weather, soon.

"Ocean circulation could change over a relatively short time scale, over a few years, that we could slowly increase the temperature, and ocean circulation would stay mostly the same,” said Dr. Theodore Dibble, SUNY ESF. “Then, all of a sudden, we get too far, and we tip the balance, and ocean circulation could change drastically, and drastically change the climate for most of the globe."

The NAS, an independent organization that advises the government on scientific matters, says because of these changes, they see Europe's climate becoming more like Siberia's in the next 15 years.

Dibble says that doesn't sound too far off, and the United States may see similar drastic changes.

Global warming

Imagine living in New York but seeing palm trees in your back yard, or going to the grocery store to buy bread made from wheat grown on foreign soil. Sound like a Hollywood movie? News 10 Now's Kristin Smith spoke with one scientist who said it could become a reality.

"The breadbasket may shift north a few hundred miles and Canada may be our source of wheat in the future," he said.

He says living in Alaska will feel like living in Syracuse, and living in Syracuse will feel like the Carolinas.

Florida, he says, will feel like the equator. And he says that shift could happen in our lifetime.

So why isn’t global warming at the forefront of the political world? Dibble says it's hard to pinpoint an exact reason.

But two teenage girls we spoke with say it isn't fair they may have to live through such changes.

"At this point, we should be doing anything we can to help, or to not make it any worse,” said Kirstie Long.

"I'm one person and one person can't, like, control the whole world. So, a lot of people need to get together and actually do something about it," said Jackie DiMauro.

So what can we do? Dibble says people should think seriously about buying hybrid cars to lower emissions into the atmosphere.

He says we should use only fans rather than air conditioning in the summer to save on energy. He says if we all did that, we could potentially push back the seemingly inevitably drastic changes in our climate.

Dibble says most of us would survive a major change in the ocean's circulation.

He says it would be those in undeveloped countries that would be in real danger. And according to him, many geologists in this area agree that Syracuse's winters have been getting more severe over the past century because of global warming.

Little update..

2005-07-18T16:41:49Z

So, I turn 18 in 11 days,(July 30th) im excited. I made an appointmeant with Dice that day to get a tattoo on my sholder. Its a baby dragon with smoke comeing out his nose and I want some purple smoke and bats or something around it with lots of color to cover my whole sholder. = Exciting

I start bartending and waitressing at Borios sometime shortly after I turn 18, also = exciting.
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Josh and I are going to start appartmeant hunting any day now, = exciting. Hes working at walmart now makeing alot more money so hes happy and Im glad hes happy and we'r just happy :) The only thing I dont like are his 2am LUNCH breaks, yea. Grave yard shift.

Cedar point sometime in Augest with buddy and chelsea, also = exciting...Then...one more year of FUCKING high school. I belive I will have early dismissile every day, very cool. = EXCITING

So it just looks like 18 is very eciting. I havent hung out withmany people this summer. I miss every one :/ 8637059 is how you can reach me.

brackishwishes @ 2005-07-22T20:23:00

2005-06-23T00:34:53Z

Ohhhh wow, im never online any more, my life really is too busy, yet its so simple..weird. I have the house to myself for FOUR FUCKING DAYS, PARTY AT MY HOUSE< BYOB. Just call me up 8637059.

Little update on myself..

I tended bar yesterday at work for a party, virgin bar of corse, and some kid tried giveing me his number hahahahaha..

Got in a care accident about 2 weeks ago rushing to work in the rain, it was my falt and i hydroplaind a guy fropm behind AHHH GAY.

The best news lately tho is, down the grape vine..i got my sterio face plate back, and i know who stole it, and i am NOT calling the cops b/c im hunting this kid down and personally beating the shit out of him. I already know where he lives,and the car he drives, RUN FUCKER. See two days befor I got my old one back I got a new one that I ordered in the mail, so i cant return it...so im just gunna break the old one across his face.

oh yea and ive come to the conclution that Ive found the perfect mate. :) <3

kaythatsallloveyabye.

brackishwishes @ 2005-07-01T18:07:00

2005-06-01T22:15:46Z

I dont write in this too much any more, nooooo time.

So, me and josh are doing good, we've been goign out for 3 and a half months now and we havent gotten in one little fight, go us :) My dad thinks hes a fuckin weirdo cuz he was sitting in my car yesterday at 4 in the morning when i was still sleeping, haha,long story. <3 I coulndt ask fo anything more right now, I am truely happy. All I want is for josh to finde another small side job that he likes, not fucking fast food, so that he can get an apartmeant and get the hell out of his stupid dads house.

UPDATE

2005-05-25T02:14:02Z

Well...i died my bangs a new color, what else is new, its hott. And im so proud of how cassies hair came out, its hotter than hot.

Sooo me and josh were driveing to blockbuster the other night and saw our good ol' pal justin, haha like i dont understand, i got this list of stupid shit he wants back, like..why didnt he ask for it 3 months ago when we broke up?? and the funny thing is..what makes him think im gunna give it back when he still has one of my favorite cds? all i have to say is, faggot.

Ok so prom.

2005-05-08T17:13:47Z

So...heres some prom pictures..

Stupid family pictures...

Out to eat at borios...

And I cant belive I got him to come..

Josh haveing fun at prom..

Yeah.

brackishwishes @ 2005-05-19T18:49:00

2005-04-19T22:50:48Z

So, who the fuck wants to come to Cedar Point with me this July?!

brackishwishes @ 2005-05-18T21:36:00

2005-04-19T01:46:24Z

So..i lost my red ribbon sunday night..go figure the night be4 spring break starts...um...i dont really habve any plans for spring break..but i miss getting fucked up.

Veronicas getting bigger already :)

I start waitressing my first banquet at work tomarrow, im excited, big bucks. I slways said I wodlnt wanna waitress but when I see the waitresses walk out of there with any were from 80-300 bucks a night I think i'll reconcider, and I wont have to hostess as much and work with fucking moorons. Although my boss told me he was goignt o call erika soon and give her a job, so thats cool. :)

brackishwishes @ 2005-05-11T20:26:00

2005-04-12T01:28:18Z

So...we had to take charlie back :( no one wanted him around, there was no were left for him to live. So..i got a baby iguana and i am so excited cuz they live for years and get 6 feel long and you can put them on leashes and take themf or walks and shit...here what he looks like right now tho...well..SHE..Veronica the Iguanica.

brackishwishes @ 2005-05-06T19:43:00

2005-04-07T00:46:47Z

So, ive been wanting a turanchula so josh baught me one tues. :D But now my mom wont let me have it in the house so i have to keep poor charlie in the gurage :( Fucking cunt. Thats all i have to say.

brackishwishes @ 2005-05-04T20:13:00

2005-04-05T01:13:51Z

You Belong in 1967

1967

If you scored...

1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in!

1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too.

1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all!

1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day.

1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good!

What Year Do You Belong In?

oh,and drugs hahaha wtf ok.

Um this one was just fucking gay...

SAMANTHA
S	is for	Sensational
A	is for	Altruistic
M	is for	Marvelous
A	is for	Amorous
N	is for	Nice
T	is for	Temperamental
H	is for	Humorous
A	is for	Alluring

What Does Your Name Mean?

Wow. COOL. Im nice!

i was a fucking winner yesterday.

2005-03-30T21:28:00Z

Got my belly button peirced, its annoying. Saw kyle getting his tattoo done, looked fun.
Won 50 bucks on cashword,i was generous and split it with josh sence he baught it for me.